Just Fade Away
by Lizzle09
Summary: Im sorry Ronald, its the truth." Hermione realises what everyones known all along, her feelings have grown and now it hurts, hurts to be around him, hurts to see them together and it hurts when he breaks her heart... it hurts. RonHermione OneShot.


**A/N: **Ok, my other stories are still ongoing so dont panic dear faithful readers! :P I just had a sudden erge to write this story as I love the whole Ron/Hermione relationship. So, the story is set during the Half Blood Prince as those of you have seen the film can probably tell from the first couple of lines :D I really, really felt for Hermione because Im sure we've all been there, and I actually nearly cried at this point... Erm, yeah, I really wanted to get across Hermione and how much Ron has hurt her, obviously he didnt know he was hurting her but you know lol... and I thought Harry would do the proper friend thing lol. Thanks goes to MeVsRiverSong for Beta-ing this story... thanks for making it as awesome as it can be! :D

**Disclaimer: **Harry Potter belongs to JKR... because she's awesome!

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Just Fade Away

"_**How does it feel when you see Dean with Ginny?" Hermione asked sobbing on Harry's shoulder.**_

"_**It feels like this." He tells her as he cradles his best friend through her pain.**_

Watching them together was like a car crash. It was like she didn't want to look, but she just couldn't stop staring, couldn't tear her eyes away. The memories came flooding back, hitting her just like a ton of bricks; weighing her down, helping her heart to break and making her soul shatter each time she saw _them_ together.

Hermione Granger wasn't weak. Damn it, she was strong. She was a strong, independent woman and she never thought that she would ever allow herself to fall so hard. As it turns out, not allowing herself to fall so hard was incredibly difficult. It meant when she did, it hurt all the more.

She was sitting with her best friend, Harry Potter, the Chosen One, the boy everyone hated and loved in equal measure but never quite decided which side they were on. He was going through his own turmoil, true, but he was being there for her regardless. Cradling her as she cried, kissing her forehead and pulling her closer, allowing her tears to fall just by being beside her.

She never in a million years thought that she'd like Ronald as more than just a friend. Hermione loved him, but that love had always been put down to being his best friend- never before had she thought that a friendship could transform into something so much... _more_. Well, she had heard of it happening but she never thought that it would happen to her. Not Granger, the studious bookworm who knew everything but what mattered most. Not her, surely- who'd have _her_?

She made her way back to Gryffindor Tower, knowing that the time she had spent with Harry meant that the crowds had dispersed from Gryffindor Tower and she could go and sit by the fire in peace.

"Are you going to be ok, Hermione?" Harry asked her.

Her tears had now dried, and she had gone back to her usual self. She even managed to meet her friend's gaze as she answered.

"Yes, Harry. I'm going to be fine."

Harry took that as his cue to leave and so he bid his friend goodnight. Making his way to the stairs to his dorm, Harry paused briefly on the steps and looked back towards the fire. Hermione had slumped on the arm chair, the flames throwing her into orange clarity- and he was pretty sure she hadn't finished the tears for tonight. He shook his head sadly, already making it his priority to talk to Ron tomorrow.

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Hermione slumped herself in the armchair, taking off her shoes and curling up in the chair. Trying for a comfort she hadn't felt in a long time, and it was only now that she was realising. The cushion behind her was irritating her and she threw it across the room out of pure anger… well, it wasn't anger, not really- it was more upset than anything else.

She didn't _get_ it. She didn't get why her heart was playing tricks on her like this, and she didn't want to feel like any of it anymore. The bitterness of jealousy, the pain of her heart breaking every time Hermione saw them together. It just made her sick- sick and tired and drained. But then, just because she didn't want it, doesn't mean it's not going to happen. Hermione was old enough now to know that nobody gets what they want, whether they cry or beg or plead for it.

She heard the portrait door open and saw them walk in, then. Hand in hand with her, Lavender Brown and her horribly sincere smile, her sickly delirious face. Swallowing, fighting back the onslaught of pain just bubbling at the surface, Hermione sat forward and watched them say goodnight with a long kiss. Choking back tears, she desperately disguises it as a gag.

Ron finally pulled away and Lavender left- but the hole the wretched girl had torn in Hermione's chest remained long after she was gone- and only then did he acknowledge that Hermione was there.

"Hermione, what... what was up with the birds?" Ron asked cautiously, hoping she was in a better mood.

"Ronald, if you would stop being an annoying little squirt then maybe I wouldn't have sent the birds after you." She told him forcefully. If in doubt, always hide behind bitterness, Hermione. Rule Number One.

Ron's temper rose in response, making him go red (hadn't she always liked that colour of his skin?) He moved towards Hermione so they were inches from each other, anger rolling off him in waves. He was angry, but Hermione was too caught up in the proximity to really care.

"Maybe, Hermione," Ron hissed, and she shivered. "You should stop being such a jealous witch because I'm dating _and you're not_." He shouted the last, and it stung her. _Now_ she was angry.

Hermione laughed sarcastically, "Don't make me laugh ,Ronald."

"Quit being so _jealous_, Hermione. It's not a good colour for a Gryffindor."

"Do not besmirch my honour, Ronald Weasley,' she shouted, seeking comfort in throwing words she knew he didn't know at him. "This is not about that _at all_,' Furious, livid beyond words, she hit him on the chest. "Just go to bed, GET OUT!" Her voice echoed, around the deserted room. Hermione turned away from Ron and he left disgruntled, not having a clue what was wrong with Hermione. Why couldn't he see what was wrong, look deep into her soul, when they used to be so close to each other?

Hermione did the only thing possible- she ran. Throwing herself down on the sofa, burying her head in the cushions, the tears freely falling now with no chance of stopping. She didn't mean to get so mad at Ron but she couldn't help it. She sobbed into the cushion, wondering why things had changed so much, and questioning why it had taken her so long to figure out how she felt. Wearily, she rubbed her hand over her face and then through her hair; curled into the foetal position, just wanting someone to come over to her and comfort her to let her know everything was going to be ok, Hermione whimpered softly.

She sniffed, trying badly to stop the tears from falling back down.

No. Hermione, you will _not_ break down. Dry your tears, you will _not_ cry anymore. She thought to herself fiercely being strong was something she was used to, and she would soon be strong again. She eyed a piece of parchment and a quill and inkwell on the table next to the fire, she walked over and picked it up and began writing.

_Dear Ronald,_

_We've been through so much, fought so much evil, seen so much change, righted so many wrongs, and been with Harry always. But I never thought that this would be the hardest moment. You have no idea how you make me feel, how the arguments make me feel, how seeing you with her makes me feel. She's just not for you, and you completely know that … yet, you still can't see what's right in front of your eyes. Me … I … Oh Ronald, how am I supposed to tell you something when I find it too difficult? When you should know if we're as close I feel we are? How am I supposed to act like I don't care when I truly do? What am I supposed to do when everything is falling apart before my eyes?_

_Ronald Weasley, you complete annoyance- I love you._

_Love, Hermione xx_

She finished scratching the note and a tear dropped onto it, right onto the bit where she had wrote _the_ three words. She wiped it and the ink smudged. She was going to give it to him, but something stopped her from doing so, so instead she put it in the fire and watched it burn to black and fall apart.

She just wished that her feelings could go like that... Because in the whole truth of it, if she could do that, just fade away… she sure as hell would. Without a doubt.

I'm sorry, Ronald- it's the truth.

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_**:)**_

_**Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it :D**_

_**R & R**_

_**Lizzle**_

_**xx  
**_


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